IBS is multiple doctor’s visits
and the look in their eyes when they diagnosis you
with anxiety, or depression, or mental instability,
Anything to explain away your symptoms
IBS is finally finding the answer
crying first tears of joy to be told that you are not
insane, or over-reacting, and then crying again when
you realize it’s permanent.
IBS is waking up at 2am and
wondering if the pain in your stomach will pass
or if it something life-threatening but not knowing
how to stop the agony.
IBS is writhing on the bathroom floor
in excruciating pain while loved ones beg to take you
to the hospital, but you know if you go, there’s nothing
they can do.
IBS is giving in to the pain,
Nearly passing out in arms that carry you to the car
Then waking up at hospital doors before you even
realized what happened.
IBS is waiting, waiting,
waiting for the pain to stop as doctors ignore you
and when they finally run their tests, you know that
they are inconclusive.
IBS is returning home
Feeling the fool for wasting time and money
on a hospital that can never give answers or solution
only frustration and debt.
IBS is wondering
when the next attack will hit and desperately
trying to live your life regardless of the secret enemy
that strikes when you least expect it.
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