Poetry – KaylaAnn

Poetry

The Winter of Our Lives

February 11, 2019February 8, 2019 kaylaannauthor

The temperature outside, below 30 degrees at time,

Is warmer than the center of my heart

The snow of the mountains, the ice on the car

Can’t match the frost reflected in my eyes

The rain that falls, attempting to wash away the past

Can’t cleanse these memories from my mind

This is the Winter

Of our lives.

Soon, hopefully soon, but terribly late

Spring will have no choice but to break through the haze

Soon, hopefully soon, but dreadfully slow

Spring will burst forth its blooms having survived the snow

Soon, hopefully soon, Spring will arrive

But until then, this is the Winter

Of our lives.

©KaylaAnnAuthor

© KaylaAnn and KaylaAnnAuthor.wordpress.com, 2018. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to KaylaAnn and KaylaAnnAuthor.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Let it Rain.

February 6, 2019February 8, 2019 kaylaannauthor

Just fall.

Condense, collapse

Pour down on me

Let it rain

Let it fall from the skies

Sheets, Buckets, Torrents

Of rain that blind my sight

That drowns out my hearing

That suffocates my breathing

Grey skies that darken, that roll, that rumble

Wind that howls and whips my hair into a frenzy

Fist-sized pellets of rain that sting my skin and eyes

Let it fall

Let it rain

Let it come down on me

Until I’m struggling, gasping, begging

For air.

There is a storm inside of me.

Waiting

•

Waiting

•

Waiting

For a blue sky.

©KaylaAnnAuthor

Poetry

Loss and Laughter

February 4, 2019January 31, 2019 kaylaannauthor

It’s so good

That she remembers how to laugh

Even when the laughter

Can’t reach

her eyes.

©KaylaAnnAuthor

Poetry

The Five Stages: Acceptance

February 1, 2019January 31, 2019 kaylaannauthor

Is it surrender or acceptance that I feel?

When I know your gone, but I wish it wasn’t real?

When I walk in your home, and wish to see your face?

When there is an emptiness, a void, that cannot be replaced?

Have I accepted that you are truly gone?

Does going to work mean that I have moved on?

Have I accepted that the world has changed?

That our lives have now and forever been re-arranged?

Have I reached acceptance?

That mysterious fifth and final stage?

I accept and believe that this is not the end

I accept and believe that I will one day see you again

Side-by-side-by-side, our family will reunite in Heaven

Side-by-side with Christ, who has rescued and forgiven.

©KaylaAnnAuthor

Poetry

The Five Stages: Depression

January 30, 2019January 24, 2019 kaylaannauthor

Condensed, thick fog

Surrounds my brain

Useless hands hang idly by

We were talking about . . .

something . . .

Weren’t we? But have you

noticed how foggy it is today?

How it muffles the sounds

And it suffocates the sights

How it blurs the ability to take in

And halts the ability to extend out

We were talking about . . .

something . . .

Weren’t we? But have you

noticed the fog?

©KaylaAnnAuthor

Poetry

The Five Stages: Bargaining

January 28, 2019January 28, 2019 kaylaannauthor

It’s the “what if’s”

And “If only’s”

That causes our sleepless nights

What if the doctors had listened

Had given weight to his claims of pain

If only we had known sooner

Had realized how time would fly so quickly

Yes, it’s the “what if’s”

And “if only’s”

That flicker through our minds

©KaylaAnnAuthor

Poetry

The Five Stages: Anger

January 25, 2019January 24, 2019 kaylaannauthor

The record turns and wobbles

Scratched screams and sobs echo from the vinyl

But before it goes on to long

Let me set the record straight

There is no anger against you

You were a fighter, a champion

And even though we lost you

You did not lose

There is no anger against God

Who said no to a miracle,

But said yes to ending

Your pain.

There is anger against the Devil

Anger against sin, anger against

The sickness, the cancer that

ravaged you body.

There is anger when I think

Of what you will miss

But there is no anger

Against you.

There could never be anger

Against you.

©KaylaAnnAuthor

Poetry

The Five Stages: Denial

January 23, 2019January 21, 2019 kaylaannauthor

Refusal

Deep-rooted in crystal clear understanding.

Rejection

Even though the mind has already accepted.

The fact that you have left us.

Poetry

Do You Want to Know What Love Is

January 18, 2019January 15, 2019 kaylaannauthor

Love is fifty plus years of marriage

Coming to a close in a room

At home while he lies

In a hospital bed

Love is how she dotes on him

Rubbing lotion in small

Circles on his skin and

Carmex on his lips

Love is how she helps to change

him and squirt water on

His dry tongue, doing

Whatever she can

Love is how he sometimes seems

To recognize her face, to touch

Her cheek with shaking fingers

And although he can no longer

Speak, his eyes show the love

And admiration he has

For the woman by his bedside.

That is love.

Poetry

Conflicting Emotions

January 16, 2019January 15, 2019 kaylaannauthor

Cascading spa-colored fabric

That ruffles down, extenuating their figures

lightly brushing against the

Silver strapped heels

An argument about a morphine drip

That soothes pain and yet,

Simultaneously, steals away what

Precious little time remains

Teardrop necklaces that rest

Perfectly between the collar bones

Kissing their skin right above

V-shaped necklines

Caregivers that do their best to

Give care where they can and warning

Where they cannot, whispering,

“Prepare yourself for the end.”

The family and friends who murmur

“Congratulations on your Engagement”

and “Our Condolences” on your grandfather’s health

In the same sentence.

A man that loves me with all his heart

And a man who showed me what love is

The best

and

The worst

Memories occurring

Side by side.